Grateful

340 more days to go before our wedding. Planning is truly exhilarating. I've always loved planning. It's an arduous process which I enjoy. Planning for this event may be easy (because it's enjoyable), but saving up for this is surely not.

Of course, it wouldn't be easy. I graduated just a year ago, have been working for eight months, and truthfully, my earnings for a day wouldn't even be enough to buy a single meal for a guest for my dream wedding.

A month ago, I cried to Gary because of this realization. I was on the verge of giving up my dreams of having a beach wedding. I told him I was willing to marry him anywhere. It wouldn't really matter, right? I'm marrying the man of my dreams. This is just a one-day event, after all.

He just laughed at me and said, "I know you more than anyone. We both wanted this. Stop crying, para kang hindi Christian nyan ha! Have faith."

At that moment, I felt ashamed and sorry. I focused on the circumstances and forgot how powerful God is. I felt ashamed of how I let my worries win a victory over my faith in Him. I've underestimated His kindness and grace.

After we talked, I prayed, Lord, kine-claim ko ang beach wedding namin next year. Ngayon pa lang, I'm thanking you because I know You'll give us more than enough. Thank you, Lord.


Everyday since then, I always mutter that simple prayer. I've once heard that worry, replaced by prayer, equals trust.

And I trust God that next year, I'll be walking on fine, pretty (if not white), sand, barefooted, towards the man I love, to say I do. (I get so kilig and excited when I imagine this!)

I know that our expenses would be big, but I'm pretty sure God is bigger!